WEDNESDAY 11.13.02 - DAY 12

Barcelona to Madrid


“Look our for that truck…Ooooffff…Yowwwieee.”
“Yes dear.”

“Yeeegadss, Watch that Mootttttoooooo…..Eeeeekkk!!!”
“Yes Dear.”

“Ayyyyyy…Maaadreee Diosssss….Ok….Get in this lane!”
“Yes DEAR…Uhhh which lane was that?”

“This one…. on the right, [gesturing with her left hand]”
“Yes Dear…” [He looks quizzically]

“Just get in this lane here…. you know what I mean!”
“Yes Dear, your other right....”

Ahhhhh, the Joys of driving in a foreign country with the White Knuckle Navigator, as the “moto’s”whiz past on either side, and we try to jockey for space in a lane currently occupied by a large tractor trailer truck, and 2 [or was it 3] motor scooters.

I have long since learned that the “Two Most Important Words” in any marriage, play a increasingly important part in marital harmony, when driving through the narrow lanes and highways of Spain, with the Ever-Lovely but Veerrrry White Knuckled Navigator Illy….. “Yes Dear” keeps me relatively out of trouble [most of the time] until the next oooff or eeeek, and allows me to continue doing whatever I was doing in the first place.

But once again, dear friends, family and innocent bystanders, we must re-wind back to the start of the: Wacky American Tourist’s - Last Day in Barcelona.


9AM Barcelona

Brrrrrrrriiinnnnnggg!!!!!!
The increasingly educated alarm [it is learning when to ring… as long as Chuckie pulls the bent stem out far enough] jars us from our blissful slumber after the excellent meal last night at La Fonda Escudellers.

After a quick shower, and the final packing it is time to have a little Desayuno and get on the road to Madrid. But first…

We did not get to the Museu Picasso the day before as planned. Since it was within walking distance of the hotel, we decide that we couldn’t leave Barcelona without doing this. We check out first and left the luggage in the baggage room and head off for Calle Montcada with its several old palaces to #15, the Palau Aguilar, which houses the Museu Picasso. The main entrance is under renovation so we finally find #23 and pay the tariff for both the Picasso Museum itself and Jean Planque exhibition [a renowned collector and friend of Picasso] which displays his highly regarded collection of the works of Picasso himself as well as several offerings of Degas, Redon, Van Gogh, Gauguin, Bissiere, Kosta-Alex and many others.

The combined tour took significantly more time than we had hoped to spend and was in fact a tad disappointing. While the Planque collection was interesting in its diversity, the Picasso side was mostly his personal collection and sketches, since most of his great and better-known works are hanging elsewhere.

It was now getting on towards 2PM and I had wanted to be on the road long ago having been warned that the roads to Madrid from Zaragosa [our planned mid-point break] was a bit mountainous and truck congested and not great at night. So much for that idea. We headed back to the hotel, through the rest of the Ribera Quarter where the Picasso Museu is located, past the interesting monument to the Fallen Hero’s of the Battle for Catalunyan Independence and around the Main Post office to Carrer Ample and the hotel.

Illy remembered that she needed to leave her written request with Lt. Amerigo at Army HQ, [she didn’t trust it getting to the right department if she mailed if from home] so after I retrieved the car and loaded the luggage, we sat in front of the hotel while she sketched out her request at length.

Now, even though the Army HQ was a short walk from the hotel, getting there by car was another thing. It actually required a very winding and circuitous route involving at least 2 Very Illegal Pirula’s and we arrived in front of the HQ at around 3PM. As parking at their front door was obviously frowned upon [3 armed guards were approaching the vehicle menacingly] we were immediately asked to move down the block… I moved the car as Illy ran off to find her buddy Lt. Amerigo.

And, Of course… his office was closed. Now Illy was trying to explain all this to another strange officer, who by the looks of it from where I was parked was not too receptive to what she was trying to impart. I, hopped out of the car and trotted over to the lively discussion, and threw out the question

“Senior Amerigo esta Aqui Ahora?”
“That’s, the name I couldn’t remember,” she says.

This seemed to open the receptive channels as the new officer immediately softened up,

“Ahhhh, Amerigo…Si Senora…Si..Si.”

Apparently Vespucci’s namesake must pull a little weight around here because this guy was Shucking and Jiving “Si Senora” now, where he was head shaking NO before. He then took the information from her that he had been refusing before and assured us the he would get it to the Magical and all-powerful Lt. Amerigo in the morning. [We hope]. Now it was time to navigate outta here!

The plan seemed pretty simple… Up Las Ramblas to the Plaça Catlunya, bear right on Gran Via De Les Corts Catalanes, continue on Passeig de Gracias, Siempre Deritto [Ooooppss that was in Italy], continue on to Avinguda Diagonal, hang a left for 400 m and then a right on Via Augusta, follow Via Augusta for 4.1 km, continue on E-9, Tunnels de Vallvidrera, C-16 and go 11 km, Exit on E-9, Tunnels de Vallvidrera, C-16 via ramp at sign reading “Exit 8 B-30 to Tarragona/Lleida and E-15/A-7 and go 300 m, continue on B-30 and go 2.3 km, continue on Ramp and go 120 m, continue on A-7, E-15 and go 55 km, [Yeah….Right……and we’re not out of Barcelona yet!!!!!!]

Now pretend that you are the White Knuckle Navigator, trying to decipher these anal MapBlast instructions [and these were the ones marked "Brief"] while Ooooffing, and Eeeeking…. and the Moto’s are whizzing by on either side…. All while trying to juggle a well worn and ragged city street map, a national highway map… And… Chuckie driving like a madman in the Pre-Rush hour congestion and you get…..

“Look our for that truck…Ooooffff…Yowwwieee.”
“Yes dear.”
“Yeeegadddss, Watch that Mootttttoooooo…..Eeeeekkk!!!”
“Yes Dear.”
“Ayyyyyy…Maaadreee Diosssss….Ok….Get in this lane!”
“Yes DEAR…Uhhh which lane was that?”
“This one…. on the right, [she gestures with her left hand]”
“Yes Dear…” [He looks quizzically]
“Just get in this lane here…. you know what I mean!”
“Yes Dear.”
“No….not that one….this one……Ayyyy Madre de…..we just missed the turn-off for Tarragona/Lleida.”
“No problem dear, there is a “Cambio Sentido” up ahead.

Ahhhh… Cambio Sentido… A nifty little highway application, which translated Literally, is “Change of Sentiment”, which really means, “Change your Mind?” It is accompanied by a cute Picture sign which assists the translation and indicates that in 300 meters you can make a “Legal U turn”, assisted by a nifty little ramp off, up and over the highway and back in the opposite direction. [I swear they planned these just for us] However, apparently they realized some time in the past that their road signage “Sucked”…. And a great deal of people needed to “Cambio Sentido”… A LOT!

Now of course, we weren't headed for Tarragona/Lleida…. or so we thought, and once again proceeded to take the high road, not the low road and promptly added another 95 km to the trip by heading straight for the French boarder. By the time we discovered that we were on a Truck route and had to find a way back to A-7 that would turn into A-2 and then…. Ohhhh forget it…. Just know that… “this was gonna be a very interesting trip back to Madrid!!!”

Upon arriving in Manresa [30 km north of our target route] we stopped for a quick bite, and a call to Fernando in Madrid to advise him that we would not make it back in time for Tapas tonight, [and at this rate, maybe not for another week…well maybe there was hope yet…] He understood when we told him where we were. He actually had a big group in house and we agreed that maybe it was better for dinner Thursday night. He also advised to be careful on this route at night…lots of trucks… [We already knew that, but thanked him for his concern.]

Once back on the road, we finally found a connecting route to get us to Zaragoza avoiding most of the truck routes, but then the fun Really began. By now it was already nightfall and we decided not to stop in Zaragoza, but head straight…. [as straight as our Wacky navigation would allow] for Madrid. With any luck, we would get there by 9 or 10PM [Yeah…Right!!]

5 minutes out of Zaragoza the rain hit… and the trucks started stacking up… and the road started winding treacherously up the hill…. and down the hill…. with some pretty steep grades…. And the wind picked up…and…. and…dear hearts…. I gotta tell ya….. This was gonna be ONE TOUGH RIDE!

From my mouth to God’s ear… it was Really Rough. Not only did we blow past a couple key turns, but then… the rains got heaver. It turned into a “5 Pirula”, medium speed White Knuckle run [for both of us] from Zaragoza to Madrid, with one of the missed turns causing a 36 km round-trip to get back on the right track. All this, while trying to dictate a NOWAT to one Very Nervous W.K.N., trying to keep her mind off the narrow winding roads, sheer drop offs and Big Mutha Trucks.
Didn’t work… and we had to suspend the dictation till we got to Madrid.

35 km outside of Madrid we decided one last time to try the instructions from MapBlast for the final leg of the run and after only one missed-cue [a back to back pair of Cambio Sentido’s cured that] we actually found our way to the hotel Regente without incident.

By now it was 11PM and we had to get something to eat soon or I would surely loose my arm [She was Gnashing again!!]. After check in at the Regente and a short trip to park the car at Plaça del Carmen, [it was too far from the Avis Garage and I was gonna get charged for an extra day anyway] and we were off to Café Zahara on the corner from the hotel. We decided to first upload the most recently edited NOWAT and check mail as the Zahara’s Internet loft closed soon, unfortunately so did the restaurant. Sooooo…. at 1AM it was off in the misty drizzle to the closest VIPS [Spain’s ultra modern answer to Denny’s]

By 2:30AM, frozen and damp to the bone [the weather had changed radically in Madrid from our last visit just 10 days ago] we were back at the hotel and ready to crash.

Tune in for our last Day in Spain and…..

Ciao 4 NowChuck and the very cold, tired, but at least not hungry for awhile, Cuban Lady